Thursday, July 25, 2019
By: Erin Leydon
Today, we taught at the Ely Public Library in Ely, Nevada. It was our eighth learning festival out of ten total, so we're nearing the end of our teaching days. At this point, we've each taught a lot of kids and had them say a lot of strange things to us, so here is a list I have gathered:
Evan: Does anyone else have an Alexa at home?
Kid: My brother has dyslexia!
Devin: Let's go around, introduce ourselves, and say what we like about science!
Kid: I'm God and I like to burn things.
Evan: How do you spell your name?
Kid: G-O-D.
Evan: Can anyone think of an example of a nice thing to say?
Kid: You smell like a nicely perfumed tuna fish.
Another adult: What do we say when someone does something nice for us?
Kid: Sorry.
First Kid: I'm six years old!
Me: How old do you think I am?
Second Kid: Probably thirteen.
Third Kid: No twelve!
Devin: How old do you think I am?
First Kid: Well you're taller than her, so you must be older. I think he's 100 and she's 99.
Second Kid: I heard when you're 110 you die.
Kid, to Evan about Edgardo: He sounds like Mexican Shrek.
Devin: So if we were wondering what would happen if we dropped a pen, how could we test that?
Kid: SLIME!
Bill: What do you guys know about biology?
Kid: It's the study of all of the orgasms!
Me: And now I'm going to pour the bleach into this cup.
First Kid: Can I drink it?
Devin: NO!
(At this point, I pour in the bleach and the food coloring disappears.)
Second Kid: Woah it looks like water now! I could give this to my parents and poison them!
Devin: NO!
Kid, to me: My sister is mean to me. Can you be my sister instead?
Kid, whispering to Caralyn very seriously about Leah: Is she the actress from Umbrella Academy?
Kid, to Devin and me: Are you guys best friends?
Me: Yes, of course.
Kid: You guys are going to get married one day.
Kid: How do you spell "So long, sucker?"
Me: S-O L-O-N-G S-U-C-K-E-R.
Kid: How do you spell "So long, loser?"
Me: S-O L-O-N-G L-O-S-E-R.
Kid: How do you spell "So long, froggy?"
Me: S-O L-O-N-G F-R-O-G-G-Y.
Me: So we're talking about atoms, which are really small.
First Kid: Even smaller than an ant?
Me: Yes, even smaller.
Second Kid: Even smaller than an aphid?
Me: Yes, even smaller.
At this point, most of the kids were looking at me in stunned silence.
Kid: So where do you guys stay?
Bill: We stay with a lot of people who host us in their homes.
Kid: So it's kind of like the above ground railroad!
Bill: Uh, I guess so.
Me: So what do you think will happen when we do the whoosh bottle?
Kid: Devin's arm will fall off!
Caralyn and Leah: Write down ideas for bad carnival games!
Kids, at different learning festivals: Try not to get hit in the nuts! Watch paint dry! Your parents tell you you're adopted! Say your social security number and credit card number as fast as you can! It's a dunk tank, but the dunk tank is filled with pee! Put a steak in your mouth and feed it to a lion!
Maile: So with this kind of technology, scientists can manipulate DNA.
Kid: I'm going to put strawberry DNA in my DNA so I can become a strawberry.
Caralyn: Does anyone have any ideas for something we could build in ten minutes that would keep a ball rolling for as long as possible without us touching it?
Kid: I would launch it from a catapult, and then it lands in a funnel and rolls around in circles, and then goes on a ramp, and then it bounces off a trampoline into a slingshot, and then it slingshots.
In conclusion, we've had the kids we're teaching tell us a lot of off the wall things. It's sad that we only have two learning festivals left, because I've discovered that I really do enjoy teaching as well as learning from kids who are still figuring things out. Anyways, I should probably head to sleep. Goodnight, and thanks for reading!
Happy Birthday Grandma!